The goat has a few attitudes on life.
Things That Really Piss Us Off
Here are a few of the things that
Really Piss Us Off at the goat.
If you have any questions or comments about the
please contact us by email.
email the goat
Here at the goat we consider ourselves to be fairly easy going, but there are a few things that
really piss us off. We have included a few of them here for your enjoyment.
These are the folks who talk so loud in public places that nobody else gets to have a
conversation. You know the type. You go out for a nice quiet dinner, and all you can here is
the foghorn leghorn jerk 3 tables away talking about his day. Some of these morons are so
loud that they probably don't even need a phone to call long distance. Whats even more
amazing is when they have blue tooth and are walking down the street, telling the whole world
what is on their mind. Shut the hell up!
Have you ever been at a beverage counter waiting for your turn, and the person in front of you
is totally oblivious? You know the type. They are taking their dear sweet time doing who knows
what, plus they are swaying back and forth in a random pattern that you can't quite figure out.
All you want to do is reach in a get a straw so that you can go sit down and eat your food
before it gets cold. But no, that's not going to happen because there is a self important
counter swayer in your way. Eventually, you say excuse me, and they give you a what the hell
is your problem sort of look. Swayers, get a clue.
Booth busters are the folks (usually large) who sit in the booth behind you and lean back and
forth continuously, with vigor, shaking the back of the booth with their motions. This makes it
impossible for you to sit back in the booth and relax. Your entire dining experience consist of
leaning forward to avoid the after shocks. Stop rocking.
This happens in grocery stores, Wal-Mart, and pretty much anywhere else that has shopping
carts. Aisle Idiots are the nimrods who stop to look at something on the shelf and they turn
their shopping cart diagonally in the center of the aisle so that it is completely blocking
everybody else. Then they take their dear sweet time looking at items, reading labels, or
sometimes just standing there with a blank look on their face. Completely unaware of their
surroundings, they are clueless. Wake up and get out of the way.
Ever have a conversation with someone who doesn't understand that conversations are
supposed to be two way? You know the type. They never shut up. And if you do manage to get
a word in edgewise, they cut you off mid sentence, and keep on talking. Wouldn't you love to
tell them to, "Shut up, you are not that interesting!"
Sound of Obesity
The sound of obesity is the ungodly racket you hear at coffee shops when they are running
those frapa-hearing loss machines. You know, the machines that make the billion calorie
obesity drinks that are ever so popular these days. So go ahead and order up, get fat, and
enjoy. We will be the folks at the back table wearing the hearing protection devices. Say What?
How many times have you been coming or going from a public place and some kind sole
rushed up to the door to hold it open for you? Sounds like a nice friendly gesture, doesn't it.
The only problem is that they are standing in the doorway, in your way, so that you can't get
by. Now how is this supposed to help? If you are going to hold the door, do it in such a way that
the person you are holding it for can get through the door. Otherwise, get out of the way. You
are not being helpful. You are just a nuisance, and stop smiling. You are not that helpful.
You are standing in a line. The guy in front of you just placed his order and when he leaves
the counter, he proceeds to backup right into you. And he keeps coming, as if you were in his
way. Doesn't he understand the concept of a line. There are people behind you! They don't
want to be backed over when you leave. Look where you are going.
Hold The Doors
Some restaurants have double doorways so that people can come and go on cold days and
never let a blast of air in to freeze the patrons. It's a great feature when it works. The only
problem is that it is not fool proof. Inevitably, a group will come along and one of them will rush
up to hold the 1st door. Then another will shoot ahead to hold the second door. Of course,
these door holders will be the Door Dimwits of the group and stand in the way of their parties
entrance or exit, causing both doors to be open for an extended period of time. It just goes to
show that no matter how hard you try, some things can't be made fool proof. Close the doors!
email us your thoughts
This is just a few of the things that really piss us off here at the goat. We will be adding more
as we have time. It is our suspicion that there are a few things that piss you off as well. Why
don't you let us know what they are? Who knows, we might even include them on our site.